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Remember when you were a kid and you had to share with a sibling or a friend? Kneeling down so you to make sure you both have the exact same amount in each cup. Splitting everything down the middle so ‘everyone would be happy’? Was anyone really happy? Compromise is the easy way, not the fair way or the best way. We do it because we want to avoid confrontation, avoid hearing NO and to avoid a fight. Our brains and bodies are trained to go towards safety and move away from pai

In my previous post I discussed the importance of determining what matters most to your ex and what drives your ex’s behavior and decisions. This is only step one, step two is demonstrating that you understand what is important to your ex, in order to gain your ex’s trust. In his book, Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It© Chris Voss talks about the concept of Tactical Empathy and how it is a crucial element in successful negotiations. Let’

1. Provide Unconditional Love & Support to Your Adult Child A grandparent’s natural tendency is usually to care for the grandchild above all else. Under normal circumstances, this may work well, but in a divorce, a grandparent’s first priority should be to support their adult child. If your adult child doesn’t feel supported this can affect their ability to parent well and may also affect your opportunities to spend time with their grandchildren. A divorce is the second most

I learned a new term recently which explains why I struggle with certain decision making and excel at others. It’s called ADHD paralysis and it’s very similar to what many of my clients experience when in the midst of a divorce . This paralysis traps a person between “there is so much information to consider” and “I can’t make up my mind”. This can result in procrastination, avoidance and sometimes complete decision paralysis which renders one unable to act on any decision u

With our constant need to be entertained you wouldn’t think we crave predictability and consistency, but we do. We complain about boredom, but we resist change because transitions, and changes to our routines tend to cause us stress. Now imagine being a child whose parents are divorced…and you have to change households every week...every week you pack up your things, move to a different place, sleep in a different bed, follow different rules and just when you get acclimated,